Top 10: Cars To Have Sex In
Tuesday, October 20th, 2009Having sex in cars isn’t just for horny teens, it can be a zesty diversion from the bedroom’s discreet confines. You only need a little imagination, maybe some accessories of choice and of course one of our ideal cars to have sex in. ?If you’ve learned anything from reading AskMen.com, it’s that you don’t just settle for the first condom or sex toy you see in the shop. You have to experiment to find the best proverbial and literal fit for you and your partner. Same goes for a carnal car. Bigger is not necessarily better and the old proverb still applies; it’s how you use what you have.
So in that vein, we’re not going to bang on about the internal dimensions of vans and trucks, but the kind of motors we drive in our day-to-day lives (and dreams, unless you’re shockingly loaded). We’re including a rough indication to each car’s potential sex space plus the ideal position to try with each car. On-the-road prices have been left out so you can explore a little on your own. So if you find one you can’t resist, you can always dicker at the dealership.
No.10 – Smart Fortwo (Passion)
Sex space: Tight
Ideal position: Ballerina — standing, since there’s no place to go arse up.
We urge you to consult a physician before tapping this as a car to have sex in, but you ought to make the Passion trim level live up to its name. Plus, the Cabriolet gives you unlimited headroom. And it’s going to take sex in a smart to really get enthusiastic about it, because great mileage and park-anywhere capabilities arouse interest for only so long. Unfortunately, with the demise of the Smart Forfour model we’ll never get the chance to see if a Smart can, infact, accommodate a foursome.
No.9 – BMW X6 M
Sex space: 51.2 cu.-ft
Ideal position: Scissors — since you’re in an X6, your bodies can emulate the letter.
The BMW X6 is like the love child of an X5 and a 6 Series coupe; with more sport than the former and more utility than the latter. And now, the 555-horsepower M edition ups the performance, as well as the confusion as to this niche-filler’s purpose. We’re proud to have cracked that nut though: It’s a car to have sex in.
No.8 – Ford Mustang Convertible
Sex space: (Top up) Hold your horses; (Top down) Giddy-up!
Ideal position: Reverse Cowgirl — having the top down and the front seats forward helps immensely.
Of all the cars to have sex in, a Mustang is not the most commodious. Making it a fait accompli demands you be under four-feet tall, or an exhibitionist with a convertible. That said, the Mustang has a raw sexual swagger the Chevy Camaro and Dodge Challenger lack. And you can’t compensate for swagger with a pill, pal.
No.7 – Alfa Romeo 159 Sportwagon
Sex space: Not as much as you think. Ideal position: Missionary — you’ll be a true alpha male (or alternative below).
The Sportwagon is the only sexy Italian with any feasible kinky boot potential. Though the limited headroom in this faux-estate could well stem your stallion performance in the heat of the moment, fold the back seats down for some added length. You may prefer to opt for the significantly safer and cuisine inspired Spoons position instead, so you don’t make a right ciabatta yourself.
No.6 – Ferrari 612 Scaglietti
Sex space: Some, consider stretching first
Ideal position: Lotus — no, not the car, but the wrapped-around-each-other approach; that’s about all there’s room for in this case.
Ferraris are simply sexual, but only the four-place 612 Scaglietti has a cockpit with enough space to consider the physical act. Even then, it’s anything but flat and spacious for sexcapades. If the ambiance alone isn’t enough reward, leave the engine running while parked and rev the V12 while you’re in the act for aural pleasure.
No.5 – Bentley Motors Limited
Sex space: “Adequate,” to paraphrase Rolls-Royce
Ideal position: Victory — her legs in the “V” formation like Winston Churchill’s famous gesture. Just try not to picture his face while you’re in the moment.
It isn’t that “Flying Spur” sounds a bit like “flying sperm,” this damn posh car to have sex in is like a W12-powered hotel suite — if one were capable of 195 mph. Minimal outside noise will be drowned by her vocal approval and the throbbing 1,100-Watt Naim audio system, so you’ll be hard-pressed to isolate the source of all the velocity.
No.4 – Volvo V70
Sex space: 72.1 cu.-ft
Ideal position: Deck Chair — with the right angle, she’ll spell Volvo with capital Os.
The car that’s good for IKEA runs just happens to be great for fükenhård as well. And don’t we all appreciate versatility? Volvo’s V70 descends from a line of wagons designed without protractors. Little by little, the lines have softened, but the interior room still makes it a great car to have sex in. If you need a mood enhancer in the spirit of the car, bring a cryptic, wordless, sexual “picto-manual” — or play ABBA and Ace of Base. Or not.
No.3 – Lexus LS600h LWB
Sex space: At least a lapful
Ideal position: Arm Chair — be sure to check for rear-window footprints afterward though.
You would imagine sex in a Lex to be like the driving experience: passionless and very quiet. The only reason the LS 460 L is among cars to have sex in is the available Executive Class Seating’s reclining and massaging right rear seat, combined with the optional DVD system. If you need it spelled out further, please get up to speed with articles from Doc Love and The Player, then head for your unsuspecting Lexus dealer
No.2 – Rolls Royce Phantom Coupé
Sex space: Strictly limited — like your chances of getting in one of these Ideal position: Reverse Cowgirl – you’ll both be seeing stars – quite literally!
Getting lucky would be painfully easy in this uncompromising slab of homegrown muscular metal that you’d probably not even make it inside the car before she couldn’t resist helping herself to you.
If you did get inside – so to speak – the inviting suicide doors give you both easy access to which ever bit of finest cowhide you fancied getting comfortable on whilst the Phantom’s unique starlight ceiling would make her feel she’s somewhere very special indeed – and not in the Rolls Royce dealership!
You could save for a couple of lifetimes for one of these Rollers and it’d always be well worth it – unparalleled luxury from every angle, in and out.
No.1 – Mitsubishi L200 Long Bed (Animal)
Sex space: King-size
Ideal position: Just about all of them
Well, OK. We did kind of said no trucks – but this one was simply made for having sex in and it would just be wrong for the Mitsubishi L200 Long Bed (in Animal spec, naturally) not to be AskMen’s Champion Car To Have Sex In 2009.
Boasting 7 inches extra bed length than the standard model you’ll put a smile on her face that’ll never come off in the back of this bad boy.
Not only is the rear of this baby longer – it’s deeper too. And if it starts raining – or you draw too big a crowd – it’s got a hard top cover you can hook on so you can carry on exercising even more of your lustful animal instincts until the suspension packs-up.